Podbit · The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett
Growing up with a revolving door of father figures and an addicted mother, Vance developed what he now recognises as avoidant attachment — always assuming people would leave, threatening to break up in arguments, and assuming the world was about to fall apart. He says it took years of marriage to overcome.
Outside South Korea's National Assembly, protesters have stacked funeral wreaths on the sidewalk demanding an end to single-stock leveraged ETFs. Seventy percent of investors in Samsung and SK Hynix leveraged products are in the red. South Korea has rolled out a debt counseling hotline as part of its national suicide prevention program.
South Korea's leveraged ETF disaster isn't just a financial story — it's a social one. A 40% decline in marriage rates, a 0.8 fertility rate, and a pervasive loneliness crisis have produced a generation of young people with no long-term stake in the future. Financial nihilism — the belief that only a lottery-ticket bet can deliver security — is the inevitable result.
After her father died when she was 15, Susan David spiraled into bulimia while performing strength at school. An English teacher handed her a blank notebook with one instruction — 'write like no one is reading' — and that single act of being seen launched 20 years of emotions research.
Nelson Mandela didn't suppress his anger at apartheid — he let it signal his values. But he also knew emotions are data, not directives. To move toward equality, he had to sit down with his oppressor. His emotions pointed the way; his values chose the action.
We talk endlessly about external bias, but rarely about self-bias — the moment under stress when you fall back on your upbringing's narrative and use it against yourself. 'Maybe they were right, maybe I'm not cut out for this.' A 10-minute values-writing exercise can break that pattern for years.
Susan David's three truths: there is a 5-year-old inside you asking to be seen; self-compassion is the cornerstone of resilience, not weakness; and courage is not the absence of fear but fear walking — holding both terror and values simultaneously, the way her dying father taught her.
Dating apps make it look like a tiny fraction of men hoard all female attention, but actual partner-count data tells a different story. The promiscuous 10-20% of men are largely having sex with the equally promiscuous 10-18% of women — they're just very visible online.
Roughly 18-20% of men and 12-18% of women report 3+ sexual partners per year, and these groups largely overlap. The vast majority of sex happens in relationships; casual sex is the brown dwarf at the edge of the galaxy.
Monogamous marriage functioned as a sexual redistribution system: it guaranteed even average men access to a partner by constraining the mating market. Researchers call it 'sexual communism'. Now that guardrail is gone.
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