Snapshot · On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Buddhist teacher and death educator Frank Ostaseski founded Zen Hospice in San Francisco and teaches that dying is fundamentally about relationships — to self, loved ones, and the sacred.
Where this was said
At 31:55 · chapter starts 30:28
Jay asks what proximity to death taught Lucy about living, and her answer pivots on a deceptively simple observation: until you die, you're alive. Paul exemplified this — working as a neurosurgeon for a full year after a terminal diagnosis, getting Lucy pregnant on purpose, then serendipitously becoming a writer. A reviewer described his memoir as 'crackling with life,' and Lucy found that phrase revelatory. She broadens this to aging and disability, describing how she now sees spitfire elderly women rather than 'little old ladies.' She then draws on two teachers: Frank Ostaseski, founder of Zen Hospice, who sees dying as an explosion of every kind of relationship, and physician Ira Byock, who distills the wisdom of the dying into two questions — what would be left undone if you died now, and how can you live most fully in the time you have left. Death, Lucy concludes, is not at the end of the road; it is here, always, available as a lens for transcendence — even in traffic jams.
Physician Ira Byock found that working with dying patients yields two essential questions: 'What would be left undone or unsaid?' and 'How can I live most fully in the time I have left?'
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