Ronaldo scored 2 goals vs. Uzbekistan
Cristiano Ronaldo scored two goals for Portugal against Uzbekistan in the 2026 World Cup group stage, prompting debate over his 'I'm back' declaration.
Snapshot · Pardon My Take
NBA Draft, Giannis To The Heat, Wyndham Clark, USMNT Team Captain Tim Ream + Mt Rushmore Of Hard To Spell Words
Explore episode
Jun 24, 2026
Where this was said
Ronaldo & World Cup Talk
At 31:21 · chapter starts 29:10
The World Cup segment opens with a basic geography question — 'Is Uzbekistan a real country?' — before Zach reports Portugal's 2-0 win over them, with Ronaldo scoring a brace and proclaiming he's back. The crew is skeptical: Messi already has 5 goals in the tournament, and Uzbekistan's players may literally have day jobs as plumbers [1] — Zach "Ronaldo scored 2 goals vs. Uzbekistan: Cristiano Ronaldo scored two goals for Portugal against Uzbekistan in the 2026 World Cup group stage…" 31:21 . At 41, scoring in a 6th World Cup is objectively remarkable, but the opponent context limits the 'I'm back' credibility. The bigger story is England drawing 0-0 with Ghana after Harry Kane missed a point-blank chance from 7-8 yards out. A Ghanaian witch doctor had publicly claimed to curse Kane, and it appeared to work — the same man previously cursed Ronaldo. PFT makes an immediate case for hiring him for the USMNT knockout rounds. [2] — PFT Commenter "A Ghanaian witch doctor put a curse on Harry Kane ahead of England's 0-0 draw with Ghana — and Kane missed a sitter from 7-8 yards out. The…" 35:30 African soccer federations, PFT notes, actually have rules against witch doctor use — making this man a renegade operator who appears to be getting results.
Ronaldo Scores a Brace vs. Uzbekistan, Declares He's Back
Ronaldo scored twice in Portugal's 2026 World Cup opener against Uzbekistan and proclaimed 'I'm back, I'm back.' The crew is skeptical — Messi already has 5 goals, and Uzbekistan players may literally be part-time plumbers. At 41, Ronaldo scoring in a 6th World Cup is remarkable, but the opponent context matters.
Messi has 5 World Cup goals so far
Lionel Messi scored two more goals to bring his 2026 World Cup tally to 5, leading the Golden Boot race over Ronaldo, Mbappé, and Haaland.
The Ghana Witch Doctor: Cursing Ronaldo AND Harry Kane
A Ghanaian witch doctor put a curse on Harry Kane ahead of England's 0-0 draw with Ghana — and Kane missed a sitter from 7-8 yards out. The same witch doctor previously cursed Ronaldo, which also 'worked.' PFT wants to hire him for the USMNT going forward. Bonus fact: African soccer federations actually have rules against witch doctor curses.
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