Huberman Lab

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How to Overcome Social Anxiety | Dr. Nick Epley

Explore episode May 18, 2026
Society & Culture
Down Syndrome Families All Say the Same Word

How to Overcome Social Anxiety | Dr. Nick Epley · May 18, 2026 Society & Culture

Before adopting Lindsay, the Epleys called every family they could find raising a child with Down syndrome. To a person, every family used the exact same word: blessing. They described children who drew people in, spread joy, and broadened the family's view of human possibility — just as Lindsay has done.

Where this was said

Perceived Creepiness, Social Anxiety; Developing Social Skills

At 1:36:00 · chapter starts 1:33:52

Huberman introduces the concept of 'sticky' — borrowed from a neurologist mentor — to describe people who misread a casual friendly exchange as an invitation to intimacy. He acknowledges this fear is especially acute for women around men, though it operates in all directions. Epley's response is measured: our data don't say to ignore genuine risk signals, but they do say our sense of risk is often miscalibrated. The larger cost, he argues, is the missed connection. Approaching is a skill, and like all skills it improves with practice — including the skill of reading when to disengage. The chapter closes with practical advice: start with the safe, known person in the office whose name you've never learned. That's the first rep.

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