Quote · The Tim Dillon Show
499 - Iran Forever, Belfast Riots, & College Commencement
Where this was said
Tim's Mock Fresno Community College Commencement Address
At 49:32 · chapter starts 47:20
Having demolished Baumbach, Tim constructs his own speech — the one he'd give if booked at Fresno Community College. He arrives underdressed (suits are for funerals now), greets the graduates, and immediately opens with the economic reality: Elon Musk is worth $1 trillion, $100 million is 'a joke,' a smoothie costs $45, and an Uber to a hypothetical suicide pod runs $89. [1] — Tim Dillon "Elon Musk has a trillion dollars. A billion isn't real money. A smoothie is $45 and an Uber to a suicide pod costs $89. Tim Dillon's mock g…" 47:20 Their generation has been dispossessed. The economy that was once a ladder is now a series of walls. Many of them will snap, he says — not over years, but quickly, in traffic on a Tuesday after the 15th job rejection. The speech spirals into a call to action that he refuses to explicitly complete, implying that their elders have left them no peaceful options. Then the show locates the actual Fresno City College commencement video featuring Paul Calvo, a Stanford electrical engineering grad who began at Fresno. Calvo's speech is devastating in its own way: he tells the crowd some of them came from prison cells, from homes where no one went to college, and are still trying to outrun past versions of themselves. [2] — Tim Dillon "A Stanford electrical engineering grad who started at Fresno City College gives a commencement speech acknowledging that some in the crowd …" 47:20 Tim is stunned. The real speech, he declares, is more haunting than his joke.
A Stanford electrical engineering grad who started at Fresno City College gives a commencement speech acknowledging that some in the crowd came from prison cells and are still running from past versions of themselves. Tim Dillon is shocked to find it more haunting than his own jokes.
Elon Musk has a trillion dollars. A billion isn't real money. A smoothie is $45 and an Uber to a suicide pod costs $89. Tim Dillon's mock graduation speech is darker and more honest than anything you'll hear at an Ivy League commencement.
