Distance between public/private self = shame
The distance between how you want to be seen and who you are when no one's watching is a direct measurement of the shame you carry.
Snapshot · On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Riz Ahmed: How to Silence Your Inner Critic (And Build REAL Self Worth)
Explore episode
Jun 10, 2026
Where this was said
One Story Does Not Define You
At 27:53 · chapter starts 27:49
The conversation reaches its philosophical heart when Riz reveals two ideas that together gave birth to Bait. First: life feels like one long audition. Second: the distance between your public and private self is the amount of shame you carry. [1] — Riz Ahmed "Someone told Riz Ahmed that the distance between your public and private self is the amount of shame you carry. That single idea inspired t…" 27:53 Around the time he began working on Star Wars and became more visible in America, that gap felt enormous — the perception and the reality could not have been more different. His response was to try to collapse that distance: make a show from his own vulnerabilities, neuroses, and real experiences, including a version of the skinhead attack, his panic attack supporting Wu-Tang Clan at Kentish Town Forum, and even MI5 and MI6 trying to recruit him. He also reflects on the healthy counterweight — his cousins in a WhatsApp group who compared his Oscar nomination to winning regional employee of the month.
The Distance Between Public and Private Self
Someone told Riz Ahmed that the distance between your public and private self is the amount of shame you carry. That single idea inspired the entire show Bait — and it applies to everyone, not just actors. The LinkedIn profile, the Zoom call, the Instagram grid — all of it is an audition.
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