Quote · Modern Wisdom
Why Men & Women Are Giving Up On Each Other - Daniel Cox - #1166
Where this was said
Do Men and Women Understand Each Other?
At 4:14 · chapter starts 0:00
Chris Williamson sets the scene by asking where the modern hostility between young men and women actually started, and Daniel Cox points upstream: not MeToo, not the manosphere, but the formative experiences of a generation raised online with fewer siblings and more resource-intensive, individualised childhoods. The purpose of family, Cox argues, shifted from communal betterment to personal achievement — a worldview that carries directly into adult relationships. Social media compounds this by flooding each sex with extreme caricatures of the other: the perfect relationship and the catastrophic one, with nothing ordinary in between. The upshot is a generation operating on far more pernicious stereotypes than their parents did, not because they lack information, but because the information they have is systematically distorted. A Washington Post study found that gender is one of the very first variables algorithms use to sort users, then feeds each group content that reinforces those distortions — meaning assumptions never get tested in the wild. Cox illustrates the resulting empathy gap with a vivid research moment: when he asked teenagers to imagine waking up as the opposite sex, boys defaulted to manipulation stereotypes about women, and girls to hygiene disgust about men. The only reliable antidote, he argues, is simply knowing and respecting actual members of the opposite sex. [1] — Chris Williamson "Only 42% of young men feel understood: Only 42% of young men think women understand their problems, and only 25% of young women say the sam…" 02:17
Social media feeds men and women the absolute worst caricatures of each other while stripping away the everyday, imperfect relationships that would calibrate their expectations. Combine that with smaller families and fewer cross-sex friendships, and you get a generation that talks about the opposite sex constantly but almost never to them.
Only 42% of young men think women understand their problems, and only 25% of young women say the same about men — a mutual comprehension deficit that previous generations largely closed as they aged.
A Washington Post study found gender is one of the very first variables algorithms use to separate users, then relentlessly feeds each side content that reinforces negative views of the other. Men don't see the fear-based content women receive; women don't see why men seem unbothered.
A Washington Post study found that gender was one of the most effective variables algorithms used to separate users, feeding each sex content that reinforced existing negative views of the other.
The 'would you rather be alone with a man or a bear' debate went viral not because men are objectively more dangerous than ever, but because an entire fear industrial complex of influencers and safety products had already primed women to feel that way. Once the algorithm identifies you as worried about personal safety, the content and the scrunchie drink-covers never stop.
