Bobby Lee chickened out of an Aaron Sorkin audition for Studio 60 because memorizing two pages of his dialogue felt impossible — and now admits he probably could have done it.
Bad Friends
Bobby Lee chickened out of an Aaron Sorkin audition for Studio 60 because memorizing two pages of his dialogue felt impossible — and now admits he probably could have done it.
TL;DR
Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino trade chaotic stories about restaurant bathroom emergencies, a tumor-faced coyote with a bird on its head, and Bobby's near-miss with an Aaron Sorkin audition for Studio 60. They debate SAG union leadership (Samwise Gamgee as union president?), mourn the broken promises of the actors' strike [1] — Andrew Santino "Andrew says the SAG-AFTRA strike's promise of more work and pay for actors turned out to be a complete lie — people are working less and ea…" 13:30 , rabbit-hole into tuberculosis history and climate doom, and end with Bobby downloading a Candy AI girlfriend app for science. The single most useful takeaway: tuberculosis once killed 1 in 7 Americans [2] — Bobby Lee "TB killed 1 in 7 Americans: According to a PBS documentary Bobby watched, tuberculosis historically killed 1 out of every 7 Americans." 32:46 .
Bobby Lee and Andrew Santino kick off episode 259 with bathroom disaster stories, wildlife observations, movie theme songs, a deep dive into the Social Network sequel, SAG union politics, tuberculosis history from PBS, climate anxiety, Ivanka Kushner's island purchase, AI girlfriends, and ASMR.
The episode opens mid-chaos, with Bobby recounting how he vanished into a restaurant bathroom for 20 minutes the moment he finished his eggs [1] — Bobby Lee "After a bad restaurant meal, Bobby had a Niagara Falls situation while Andrew describes his as a Pompeii explosion. The conversation escala…" 00:10 . Andrew contributes his own delayed-reaction disaster story, and the two establish an elaborate geological taxonomy for bathroom emergencies: Bobby's is Niagara Falls, Andrew's is a Pompeii explosion. The banter is fast, filthy, and perfectly calibrated — the kind of conversation that sounds absurd but somehow makes the chemistry between these two feel immediate. By the time they're debating the precise consistency of each event, the listener is already hooked.
Andrew tells the story of dinner at a Korean barbecue restaurant where his friend Andrea Jin began shifting in her seat with increasing urgency. He diagnosed the situation immediately, told her she had 8 minutes, and she bolted for her car. A text later confirmed she made it home with seconds to spare. Bobby is appropriately reverent — 8 minutes, exactly — and the conversation briefly escalates into a meditation on the closeness required to read a friend's biological urgency that precisely. It's absurd and somehow oddly touching.
A tangent about Chernobyl's surviving blue wildlife leads Bobby to reveal the crown jewel of his neighborhood mythology: a coyote with an Elephant Man-level facial tumor who was recently spotted standing in the road with a white bird sitting calmly on its head [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby spotted a coyote with a massive facial tumor standing in the road with a white bird perched motionless on its head. Andrew looked it …" 05:53 . Bobby is awed and slightly unnerved. Andrew pulls up a search and discovers this is not a simulation — it's a well-documented mutualistic phenomenon in which birds eat ticks and parasites off animals. The result is described as a spiritual omen of peace, purity, and unexpected partnerships. The hosts land on the philosophy of suckerfish, then Bobby delivers his most honest career self-assessment: his entire life has been clinging onto other people's shirts and moving on when they deflate.
Spinning out of the coyote-bird symbiosis discussion, Bobby lands on the remora as his personal spirit animal. He describes his entire career as a practice of finding a larger host, clinging to their momentum, and migrating when they run dry. Andrew notes that Bobby has never actually clung to him — if anything, the dynamic goes the other way. The confession is delivered with Bobby's characteristic mix of self-deprecation and genuine insight, making it one of the episode's most shareable moments [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby compares his entire career to a remora suckerfish latching onto larger hosts and riding them until they deflate, then finding a new s…" 07:27 .
A TikTok clip of The Social Network sent Andrew back to rewatch the 2010 Fincher-Sorkin collaboration, which he declares a perfect film — Aaron Sorkin and David Fincher as a super team, not a single dull frame from beginning to end [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby was invited to audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip — in the room with Aaron Sorkin himself. He passed because he couldn't face…" 10:18 . The hosts then surface news of a Facebook sequel called The Reckoning, starring Jeremy Allen White, Mikey Madison, and Jeremy Strong. Bobby pivots to his own Sorkin story: he had an actual audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, in the room with Sorkin himself, and walked away because he couldn't face two pages of word-for-word dialogue. He admits he probably could have handled it now. The scene captures the particular tragedy of a door you saw and chose not to open.
Bobby and Andrew pivot to the DraftKings ad read, with Andrew leaning into his self-described passion for boxing to sell the pitch. New customers are directed to sign up with code BADFRIENDS to spend $5 and get $200 in rewards within 21 days. The read is followed by the full gambling-responsibility disclaimer.
Andrew pulls no punches on the aftermath of the SAG-AFTRA strike: the promise of more work in Los Angeles, better pay for actors, and a thriving production economy turned out to be false — people are working less and getting paid less [1] — Andrew Santino "Andrew says the SAG-AFTRA strike's promise of more work and pay for actors turned out to be a complete lie — people are working less and ea…" 13:30 . Bobby's satirical prescription is equally sharp: stop electing hobbits to run Hollywood unions. He identifies SAG president Sean Astin as Samwise Gamgee, which leads directly into a debate about the film Rudy itself. Andrew argues Bobby IS Rudy — the small Asian kid from Poway who wasn't supposed to make it but did. Bobby pushes back: Rudy only played one game and got a sack. Bobby has gotten touchdowns. The argument is both absurd and oddly moving.
A game of name-that-theme-song erupts, with Bobby performing the Hereditary score from memory while Andrew guesses everything from Star Trek to Barry Goldstein. Andrew counters with the Ghostbusters theme, which Bobby calls hacky. The exchange is a perfect portrait of two guys with wildly different cultural DNA arguing in real time. The segment closes with Andrew sharing a YouTube video about the Seinfeld composer Jonathan Wolff, who reportedly wrote a different theme variation for each episode based on the specific rhythm of Jerry Seinfeld's opening monologue — a detail that genuinely surprises and delights the room.
Bobby takes the lead on the BlueChew ad, personally vouching for BlueChew Gold's four-ingredient formula — two for physical function and two for desire in the brain. Andrew reframes it as 'better sex in a tablet' while Bobby describes the knock-knock sound of a bedpost as the intended result. Listeners are directed to BlueChew.com with promo code BADFRIENDS to get a third month free when buying two.
Bobby opens the Rocket Money segment with genuine-sounding gratitude, crediting Andrew with turning him onto the app and saving him thousands annually by exposing forgotten subscriptions to games and meditation apps. Andrew contextualizes the scale: Rocket Money has saved its users over $880 million in canceled subscriptions industry-wide. Listeners are directed to rocketmoney.com/badfriends.
Bobby dives into his latest PBS obsession: the American Experience documentary 'The Forgotten Plague' about tuberculosis, which reveals the disease once killed 1 in 7 Americans [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby has been binge-watching PBS American Experience documentaries, particularly one revealing tuberculosis killed 1 in 7 Americans. His a…" 30:00 . Tuberculosis asylums in Los Angeles started as luxurious facilities for the wealthy before the poor — and specifically Black and brown communities — were pushed out. Andrew then turns the tables, exposing that Bobby's $80 annual PBS contribution is well below the average donor's $140 to $250, and that the entire gift was motivated by unlocking PBS Passport streaming. Bobby accepts the shame, promises to donate more, and then immediately qualifies that he probably won't. The segment has the rhythm of a roast and the warmth of two people who clearly share a love of accidental knowledge.
A conversation about Rudy leads Bobby to a celebrity charades story: sometime in the late 1990s, Bobby was at Vince Vaughn's house playing charades with Jon Favreau and Peter Billingsley, shortly after the Swingers crew had just exploded onto the scene. Bobby connects the dots between that night and the social network those guys formed. The discussion meanders through iconic sporting films — Hoosiers, The Natural, Ladybugs with Rodney Dangerfield — with Bobby and Andrew trading opinions on which ones hold up and which ones Bobby has never actually seen.
The episode takes a rare introspective turn when the question is put to Carlos and McCone: who distresses them more, Bobby or Andrew? Carlos diplomatically lands on Bobby — not out of malice, but because Bobby's energy is harder to read, making it difficult to know whether he's upset. He emphasizes that working with Bobby is worth every moment of uncertainty. McCone sides with Andrew for entirely different reasons. Bobby takes the feedback well, reflects on the phone call he made to McCone the previous night as an attempt to connect, and promises to be an open book going forward [1] — Bobby Lee "The crew is asked who distresses them more between Bobby and Andrew. Carlos says Bobby is harder to read — a wild card whose energy is unpr…" 36:01 . The moment lands with genuine emotional warmth beneath the comedy.
Bobby pivots to the Kachava ad by admitting he sometimes replaces entire meals with the nutrition shake, calling it a guaranteed way to hit all his nutritional bases. Andrew pitches the new travel single-serve packs as the ideal solution for people tired of protein powder scoops and giant tubs. Flavors including the returning chocolate mint are highlighted. Listeners are directed to kachava.com with code BADFRIENDS for 15% off.
Bobby opens the Shopify segment by noting the show sells its own merchandise through Shopify, lending the ad some organic credibility. Andrew emphasizes Shopify's AI design tools that allow anyone to build a professional storefront without coding, and highlights the seamless checkout experience that reduces abandoned carts. Listeners are directed to shopify.com/badfriends for a $1 per month trial.
Bobby frames the Superpower ad around wanting to know what's actually happening inside his body, while Andrew breaks down the product's scope: 100+ blood biomarkers, biological age calculation, integration of family history for hereditary risk, and optional home visits from licensed professionals. The service is positioned as far more comprehensive than a standard doctor's visit. Listeners get $20 off the $199 membership at superpower.com with code BADFRIENDS.
The Kushner island purchase triggers a full climate nihilism spiral. Bobby runs through the evidence for inevitable collapse: Super El Niño, Phoenix becoming uninhabitable in 30 years, the Pacific warming to levels not seen since the 1800s, the Great Pacific Garbage Patch spanning 300 miles [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby argues the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, warming oceans, and Super El Niño all point to one conclusion: it's over. He and Andrew brief…" 47:00 . Andrew's response is almost cheerful: if it's already over, why not enjoy private island ownership? The conversation sharpens into genuine comedy when Andrew points the finger back at Bobby — the guy who distresses rock T-shirts in a swimming pool full of coffee is a fast fashion villain himself, and lecturing anyone about the environment from that position is exactly the kind of liberal hypocrisy Andrew can't stand. The bit closes with both agreeing they should probably start a Bad Friends Foundation and immediately disagreeing about whether it should support the environment or sick kids.
Bobby goes off-script into conspiracy territory, arguing that a cure for cancer already exists and Big Pharma is hiding it for profit. His producer flags it immediately as misinformation — no one at Harvard would claim cancer is cured. Bobby graciously retracts. The conversation then spins into a riff on The Social Network sequel and a Google search that reveals Zuckerberg's original Kirkland House dorm room at Harvard has been largely preserved as a piece of tech history [1] — Andrew Santino "After debating who made out best in The Social Network story, the guys discover that Zuckerberg's original Kirkland House dorm room at Harv…" 51:57 . Andrew marvels at the photo of a Gap-wearing Zuckerberg with no idea what he was building. The crew dubs Eduardo Saverin the greatest barnacle in Silicon Valley history — $5 billion, nobody knows his name.
An offhand comment about fans using Bad Friends as sleep audio sends the episode into an exploration of ASMR culture. Bobby reveals he has been using an app called Elvish Whispers — Lord of the Rings-flavored soft whispering sounds — to fall asleep at night. He then admits, without much embarrassment, that the genre makes him horny, especially when it's a woman doing the whispering [1] — Bobby Lee "The hosts discover Bad Friends is apparently ASMR content — babies and adults alike fall asleep to it. Bobby reveals he uses an app called …" 53:30 . Andrew says he assumed ASMR was exclusively a women's medium until he discovers a thriving ecosystem of male ASMRtists. The segment is a perfect comedy spiral: genuinely surprising information delivered with zero self-consciousness.
The discovery that someone in Miami drops $10,000 a month on AI companion apps like Candy AI and Cupid AI sends the hosts into an extended discussion about artificial intimacy, the film Her, and the rapidly collapsing line between novelty and genuine attachment. Bobby announces he is downloading Candy AI immediately [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby decides to download Candy AI after the crew discusses a Miami man spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps. Paul Schrader, the …" 56:20 . His rationale: purely scientific. The crew notes that Paul Schrader — the 80-year-old screenwriter of Taxi Driver — reportedly already has an AI girlfriend, which settles the debate. Bobby is undeterred by the $5.99 monthly fee (which Andrew notes is less than his PBS donation) and begins scrolling through the app as the episode winds toward its close.
In the final moments, Carlos surfaces a video Bobby filmed of McCone from below with a hidden camera, catching him in a surprised moment — Andrew fake-congratulates the ambush. McCone ties it back to the diner bathroom situation that kicked off the episode, completing the gross-out circle. Bobby closes by asking if they should talk about poop some more, which is as fitting an ending as this show could have.
Chapter 1 · 00:00
The episode opens mid-chaos, with Bobby recounting how he vanished into a restaurant bathroom for 20 minutes the moment he finished his eggs [1] — Bobby Lee "After a bad restaurant meal, Bobby had a Niagara Falls situation while Andrew describes his as a Pompeii explosion. The conversation escala…" 00:10 . Andrew contributes his own delayed-reaction disaster story, and the two establish an elaborate geological taxonomy for bathroom emergencies: Bobby's is Niagara Falls, Andrew's is a Pompeii explosion. The banter is fast, filthy, and perfectly calibrated — the kind of conversation that sounds absurd but somehow makes the chemistry between these two feel immediate. By the time they're debating the precise consistency of each event, the listener is already hooked.
After a bad restaurant meal, Bobby had a Niagara Falls situation while Andrew describes his as a Pompeii explosion. The conversation escalates into Andrew predicting his friend Andrea Jin had exactly 8 minutes to race home before catastrophe, which proved exactly correct.
Bobby disappeared into a restaurant bathroom for 20 minutes immediately after finishing his meal, causing distress to the table.
Chapter 2 · 02:55
Andrew tells the story of dinner at a Korean barbecue restaurant where his friend Andrea Jin began shifting in her seat with increasing urgency. He diagnosed the situation immediately, told her she had 8 minutes, and she bolted for her car. A text later confirmed she made it home with seconds to spare. Bobby is appropriately reverent — 8 minutes, exactly — and the conversation briefly escalates into a meditation on the closeness required to read a friend's biological urgency that precisely. It's absurd and somehow oddly touching.
Andrew predicted his friend Andrea Jin had exactly 8 minutes to drive home before a bathroom emergency became a crisis, and he was right.
Chapter 3 · 04:55
A tangent about Chernobyl's surviving blue wildlife leads Bobby to reveal the crown jewel of his neighborhood mythology: a coyote with an Elephant Man-level facial tumor who was recently spotted standing in the road with a white bird sitting calmly on its head [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby spotted a coyote with a massive facial tumor standing in the road with a white bird perched motionless on its head. Andrew looked it …" 05:53 . Bobby is awed and slightly unnerved. Andrew pulls up a search and discovers this is not a simulation — it's a well-documented mutualistic phenomenon in which birds eat ticks and parasites off animals. The result is described as a spiritual omen of peace, purity, and unexpected partnerships. The hosts land on the philosophy of suckerfish, then Bobby delivers his most honest career self-assessment: his entire life has been clinging onto other people's shirts and moving on when they deflate.
Claims made here
Seeing a white bird perched on another animal represents mutualism in nature where the bird eats ticks and parasites, and is considered a spiritual omen of peace, purity, and unexpected partnerships.
Andrew noted that Chernobyl's exclusion zone still has thriving wildlife including wolves and dogs, though he joked they were blue from radiation.
Bobby spotted a coyote with a massive facial tumor standing in the road with a white bird perched motionless on its head. Andrew looked it up: a white bird on an animal symbolizes mutualism, peace, purity, and unexpected partnerships.
Bobby claimed to have witnessed a white bird perched motionless on a tumor-faced coyote's head in his neighborhood, which Andrew explained is actually a documented mutualistic phenomenon in nature.
Bobby compares his entire career to a remora suckerfish latching onto larger hosts and riding them until they deflate, then finding a new shirt to grab. It's the most honest and funniest career retrospective you'll hear.
Chapter 5 · 09:40
A TikTok clip of The Social Network sent Andrew back to rewatch the 2010 Fincher-Sorkin collaboration, which he declares a perfect film — Aaron Sorkin and David Fincher as a super team, not a single dull frame from beginning to end [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby was invited to audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip — in the room with Aaron Sorkin himself. He passed because he couldn't face…" 10:18 . The hosts then surface news of a Facebook sequel called The Reckoning, starring Jeremy Allen White, Mikey Madison, and Jeremy Strong. Bobby pivots to his own Sorkin story: he had an actual audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, in the room with Sorkin himself, and walked away because he couldn't face two pages of word-for-word dialogue. He admits he probably could have handled it now. The scene captures the particular tragedy of a door you saw and chose not to open.
Claims made here
Aaron Sorkin does not allow actors to improvise — they must perform his dialogue word for word.
Matt Jones, who played Badger in Breaking Bad, was going viral for speaking out about actors not being fairly compensated.
Andrew rewatched The Social Network and declared it has zero fat from front to back. He also reminded Bobby that a sequel called The Reckoning is in production starring Jeremy Allen White, Mikey Madison, and Jeremy Strong.
Bobby was invited to audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip — in the room with Aaron Sorkin himself. He passed because he couldn't face memorizing two pages of Sorkin's word-for-word dialogue. He now thinks he could have done it.
Chapter 6 · 13:00
Bobby and Andrew pivot to the DraftKings ad read, with Andrew leaning into his self-described passion for boxing to sell the pitch. New customers are directed to sign up with code BADFRIENDS to spend $5 and get $200 in rewards within 21 days. The read is followed by the full gambling-responsibility disclaimer.
Claims made here
Actors and crew are working less and earning less after the SAG-AFTRA strike than they were before, contrary to what was promised.
Andrew says the SAG-AFTRA strike's promise of more work and pay for actors turned out to be a complete lie — people are working less and earning less than before. Bobby's solution: stop electing hobbits to run Hollywood unions.
Chapter 7 · 14:05
Andrew pulls no punches on the aftermath of the SAG-AFTRA strike: the promise of more work in Los Angeles, better pay for actors, and a thriving production economy turned out to be false — people are working less and getting paid less [1] — Andrew Santino "Andrew says the SAG-AFTRA strike's promise of more work and pay for actors turned out to be a complete lie — people are working less and ea…" 13:30 . Bobby's satirical prescription is equally sharp: stop electing hobbits to run Hollywood unions. He identifies SAG president Sean Astin as Samwise Gamgee, which leads directly into a debate about the film Rudy itself. Andrew argues Bobby IS Rudy — the small Asian kid from Poway who wasn't supposed to make it but did. Bobby pushes back: Rudy only played one game and got a sack. Bobby has gotten touchdowns. The argument is both absurd and oddly moving.
Claims made here
Sean Astin, known for playing Samwise Gamgee in Lord of the Rings and the title character in Rudy, is the current president of SAG-AFTRA.
Andrew has been humming the Rudy theme in the shower, calls the film a perfect inspirational story, and argues Bobby IS Rudy — the small Asian kid from Poway who made it to the big show. Bobby disagrees because he's done way more than one sack.
Bobby Lee had an audition for Aaron Sorkin's Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip but backed out because he couldn't memorize two pages of Sorkin's exacting dialogue.
Chapter 10 · 22:50
Bobby opens the Rocket Money segment with genuine-sounding gratitude, crediting Andrew with turning him onto the app and saving him thousands annually by exposing forgotten subscriptions to games and meditation apps. Andrew contextualizes the scale: Rocket Money has saved its users over $880 million in canceled subscriptions industry-wide. Listeners are directed to rocketmoney.com/badfriends.
Claims made here
Rocket Money has saved its users over $880 million in canceled subscriptions.
Chapter 11 · 25:20
Bobby dives into his latest PBS obsession: the American Experience documentary 'The Forgotten Plague' about tuberculosis, which reveals the disease once killed 1 in 7 Americans [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby has been binge-watching PBS American Experience documentaries, particularly one revealing tuberculosis killed 1 in 7 Americans. His a…" 30:00 . Tuberculosis asylums in Los Angeles started as luxurious facilities for the wealthy before the poor — and specifically Black and brown communities — were pushed out. Andrew then turns the tables, exposing that Bobby's $80 annual PBS contribution is well below the average donor's $140 to $250, and that the entire gift was motivated by unlocking PBS Passport streaming. Bobby accepts the shame, promises to donate more, and then immediately qualifies that he probably won't. The segment has the rhythm of a roast and the warmth of two people who clearly share a love of accidental knowledge.
Claims made here
The Seinfeld composer wrote a different theme variation for each episode based on the joke structure of Jerry Seinfeld's opening stand-up monologue.
The average individual donation to PBS or NPR is roughly $140 to $250 a year, with a minimum of $5 per month or $60 a year to unlock streaming features.
Tuberculosis historically killed 1 out of every 7 Americans.
Bobby has been binge-watching PBS American Experience documentaries, particularly one revealing tuberculosis killed 1 in 7 Americans. His annual PBS donation: $80 — below the average donor and primarily motivated by wanting PBS Passport streaming access.
Bobby Lee donates only $80 a year to PBS, primarily to access PBS Passport streaming, which is below the average donor amount.
The average individual donation to PBS/NPR is roughly $140 to $250 a year, well above Bobby's $80 annual contribution.
According to a PBS documentary Bobby watched, tuberculosis historically killed 1 out of every 7 Americans.
Chapter 12 · 35:00
A conversation about Rudy leads Bobby to a celebrity charades story: sometime in the late 1990s, Bobby was at Vince Vaughn's house playing charades with Jon Favreau and Peter Billingsley, shortly after the Swingers crew had just exploded onto the scene. Bobby connects the dots between that night and the social network those guys formed. The discussion meanders through iconic sporting films — Hoosiers, The Natural, Ladybugs with Rodney Dangerfield — with Bobby and Andrew trading opinions on which ones hold up and which ones Bobby has never actually seen.
The crew is asked who distresses them more between Bobby and Andrew. Carlos says Bobby is harder to read — a wild card whose energy is unpredictable — while McCone sides diplomatically with Andrew. Bobby promises to be an open book going forward.
Chapter 13 · 36:05
The episode takes a rare introspective turn when the question is put to Carlos and McCone: who distresses them more, Bobby or Andrew? Carlos diplomatically lands on Bobby — not out of malice, but because Bobby's energy is harder to read, making it difficult to know whether he's upset. He emphasizes that working with Bobby is worth every moment of uncertainty. McCone sides with Andrew for entirely different reasons. Bobby takes the feedback well, reflects on the phone call he made to McCone the previous night as an attempt to connect, and promises to be an open book going forward [1] — Bobby Lee "The crew is asked who distresses them more between Bobby and Andrew. Carlos says Bobby is harder to read — a wild card whose energy is unpr…" 36:01 . The moment lands with genuine emotional warmth beneath the comedy.
Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump reportedly bought a $24 million island off Algeria. Bobby worries about the ecosystem. Andrew's counter: Earth is basically over, so who cares? Let someone enjoy the island.
Chapter 14 · 39:30
Bobby pivots to the Kachava ad by admitting he sometimes replaces entire meals with the nutrition shake, calling it a guaranteed way to hit all his nutritional bases. Andrew pitches the new travel single-serve packs as the ideal solution for people tired of protein powder scoops and giant tubs. Flavors including the returning chocolate mint are highlighted. Listeners are directed to kachava.com with code BADFRIENDS for 15% off.
Claims made here
Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump purchased a private island off Algeria for $24 million.
Jeffrey Epstein's private island was originally listed for $125 million and sold for approximately $60 million.
Chapter 17 · 47:00
The Kushner island purchase triggers a full climate nihilism spiral. Bobby runs through the evidence for inevitable collapse: Super El Niño, Phoenix becoming uninhabitable in 30 years, the Pacific warming to levels not seen since the 1800s, the Great Pacific Garbage Patch spanning 300 miles [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby argues the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, warming oceans, and Super El Niño all point to one conclusion: it's over. He and Andrew brief…" 47:00 . Andrew's response is almost cheerful: if it's already over, why not enjoy private island ownership? The conversation sharpens into genuine comedy when Andrew points the finger back at Bobby — the guy who distresses rock T-shirts in a swimming pool full of coffee is a fast fashion villain himself, and lecturing anyone about the environment from that position is exactly the kind of liberal hypocrisy Andrew can't stand. The bit closes with both agreeing they should probably start a Bad Friends Foundation and immediately disagreeing about whether it should support the environment or sick kids.
Bobby argues the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, warming oceans, and Super El Niño all point to one conclusion: it's over. He and Andrew briefly consider a Bad Friends environmental foundation before Andrew steers it toward healthcare and dismisses the whole thing.
Bobby and Andrew saw that UCLA runs a fast fashion sustainability program, noting the environmental damage of discarded clothing.
Chapter 18 · 51:20
Bobby goes off-script into conspiracy territory, arguing that a cure for cancer already exists and Big Pharma is hiding it for profit. His producer flags it immediately as misinformation — no one at Harvard would claim cancer is cured. Bobby graciously retracts. The conversation then spins into a riff on The Social Network sequel and a Google search that reveals Zuckerberg's original Kirkland House dorm room at Harvard has been largely preserved as a piece of tech history [1] — Andrew Santino "After debating who made out best in The Social Network story, the guys discover that Zuckerberg's original Kirkland House dorm room at Harv…" 51:57 . Andrew marvels at the photo of a Gap-wearing Zuckerberg with no idea what he was building. The crew dubs Eduardo Saverin the greatest barnacle in Silicon Valley history — $5 billion, nobody knows his name.
Claims made here
Mark Zuckerberg's original dorm room at Harvard's Kirkland House where he coded and launched Facebook has been largely preserved as a piece of tech history.
After debating who made out best in The Social Network story, the guys discover that Zuckerberg's original Kirkland House dorm room at Harvard — where Facebook was coded and launched — has been largely preserved as a piece of tech history.
Chapter 19 · 53:30
An offhand comment about fans using Bad Friends as sleep audio sends the episode into an exploration of ASMR culture. Bobby reveals he has been using an app called Elvish Whispers — Lord of the Rings-flavored soft whispering sounds — to fall asleep at night. He then admits, without much embarrassment, that the genre makes him horny, especially when it's a woman doing the whispering [1] — Bobby Lee "The hosts discover Bad Friends is apparently ASMR content — babies and adults alike fall asleep to it. Bobby reveals he uses an app called …" 53:30 . Andrew says he assumed ASMR was exclusively a women's medium until he discovers a thriving ecosystem of male ASMRtists. The segment is a perfect comedy spiral: genuinely surprising information delivered with zero self-consciousness.
The hosts discover Bad Friends is apparently ASMR content — babies and adults alike fall asleep to it. Bobby reveals he uses an app called Elvish Whispers to fall asleep but admits the genre makes him inexplicably aroused, especially when it's a woman whispering.
Chapter 20 · 56:20
The discovery that someone in Miami drops $10,000 a month on AI companion apps like Candy AI and Cupid AI sends the hosts into an extended discussion about artificial intimacy, the film Her, and the rapidly collapsing line between novelty and genuine attachment. Bobby announces he is downloading Candy AI immediately [1] — Bobby Lee "Bobby decides to download Candy AI after the crew discusses a Miami man spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps. Paul Schrader, the …" 56:20 . His rationale: purely scientific. The crew notes that Paul Schrader — the 80-year-old screenwriter of Taxi Driver — reportedly already has an AI girlfriend, which settles the debate. Bobby is undeterred by the $5.99 monthly fee (which Andrew notes is less than his PBS donation) and begins scrolling through the app as the episode winds toward its close.
Claims made here
Paul Schrader, the screenwriter of Taxi Driver and approximately 80 years old, reportedly has an AI girlfriend.
A person in Miami was spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps including Candy AI and Cupid AI.
Bobby decides to download Candy AI after the crew discusses a Miami man spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps. Paul Schrader, the 80-year-old Taxi Driver screenwriter, apparently already has one. Bobby insists it's purely scientific.
The crew noted that Paul Schrader, the 80-year-old screenwriter of Taxi Driver, reportedly has an AI girlfriend.
Andrew found a report of someone in Miami spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps including Candy AI and Cupid AI.
No indexed bits in this chapter.
Bobby compares his entire career to a remora suckerfish latching onto larger hosts and riding them until they deflate, then finding a new shirt to grab. It's the most honest and funniest career retrospective you'll hear.
Bobby was invited to audition for Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip — in the room with Aaron Sorkin himself. He passed because he couldn't face memorizing two pages of Sorkin's word-for-word dialogue. He now thinks he could have done it.
This episode
Acclaimed screenwriter praised for The Social Network and The West Wing; Bobby bailed on auditioning for his Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.
Actor known for playing Samwise Gamgee in Lord of the Rings and Rudy; mocked by Bobby for serving as SAG-AFTRA president.
Brazilian co-founder of Facebook described by Andrew as a 'barnacle on a whale' who made approximately $5 billion without much recognition.
Businesswoman and former First Daughter discussed alongside Jared Kushner for reportedly buying a private island off Algeria.
Businessman and former White House advisor discussed for reportedly purchasing a $24 million private island off Algeria with Ivanka Trump.
Facebook founder discussed in the context of The Social Network sequel and his original Harvard dorm room at Kirkland House being preserved.
Actor known for The Bear, mentioned as starring in the upcoming Facebook biopic sequel The Reckoning.
Actor known for playing Badger in Breaking Bad; mentioned as going viral for speaking out about actors not being fairly compensated.
80-year-old screenwriter of Taxi Driver noted by the crew to reportedly use an AI girlfriend app.
Public broadcasting network Bobby Lee donates $80 a year to (mainly for PBS Passport streaming) and watches extensively for documentary programming.
The Hollywood actors' union whose 2023 strike was criticized by Andrew Santino for failing to deliver promised improvements to actors' working conditions and pay.
University where Zuckerberg famously coded Facebook in his Kirkland House dorm room, which has been preserved as tech history.
2010 film directed by David Fincher and written by Aaron Sorkin about Facebook's founding, rewatched by Andrew and discussed as a near-perfect film.
AI companion and virtual girlfriend app that Bobby Lee decided to download during the episode for what he called scientific research.
Massive accumulation of oceanic plastic debris used by Bobby and Andrew as evidence of irreversible environmental damage.
Stats
This episode
Factual claims made this episode, and whether a source was named.
Tuberculosis historically killed 1 out of every 7 Americans.
Rocket Money has saved its users over $880 million in canceled subscriptions.
The average individual donation to PBS or NPR is roughly $140 to $250 a year, with a minimum of $5 per month or $60 a year to unlock streaming features.
Aaron Sorkin does not allow actors to improvise — they must perform his dialogue word for word.
Sean Astin, known for playing Samwise Gamgee in Lord of the Rings and the title character in Rudy, is the current president of SAG-AFTRA.
Actors and crew are working less and earning less after the SAG-AFTRA strike than they were before, contrary to what was promised.
Mark Zuckerberg's original dorm room at Harvard's Kirkland House where he coded and launched Facebook has been largely preserved as a piece of tech history.
Paul Schrader, the screenwriter of Taxi Driver and approximately 80 years old, reportedly has an AI girlfriend.
A person in Miami was spending $10,000 a month on AI girlfriend apps including Candy AI and Cupid AI.
Matt Jones, who played Badger in Breaking Bad, was going viral for speaking out about actors not being fairly compensated.
Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump purchased a private island off Algeria for $24 million.
Jeffrey Epstein's private island was originally listed for $125 million and sold for approximately $60 million.
Seeing a white bird perched on another animal represents mutualism in nature where the bird eats ticks and parasites, and is considered a spiritual omen of peace, purity, and unexpected partnerships.
The Seinfeld composer wrote a different theme variation for each episode based on the joke structure of Jerry Seinfeld's opening stand-up monologue.
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