Podbit · The Shawn Ryan Show

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in the UFC Opens Up Like Never Before

Explore episode Jul 27, 2026

Society & Culture

Strickland's Father: Opioids, Cancer, and a Deathbed Confession

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026 Society & Culture

Strickland's father became addicted to opioids during the epidemic, which erased whatever was left of his personality. He died of cancer so advanced the doctors couldn't understand how he hadn't noticed — he was too high to feel it. On his deathbed, in hospice at Strickland's brother's house, he called Sean over and said: 'I was really bad to you, but I didn't molest you.' Strickland photographed the body.

Where this was said

Strickland's Russian Roulette, Suicidal Ideation, and the Revolver Problem

At 1:18:05 · chapter starts 1:14:00

Following Ryan's disclosure, Strickland matches it. He describes a period of constant suicidal ideation so intense he couldn't stop thinking about it while driving on the highway. He'd burn his hand over a candle to fall asleep. He kept a loaded .38 revolver next to his bed and would spin the cylinder, load a round, put it to his head. One night a woman named Jackie grabbed the cocked gun out of his hand as he was working himself up to pull. He says the adrenaline of that moment — chemicals saturating his brain — was something he'd do anything to feel again. Even now, revolvers feel to him like 'a game I never finished.' He can't own one safely. He also describes a visualization technique for intrusive thoughts: imagining in slow motion the trajectory of a bullet through his own head, which blanks his mind and allows him to function.

Health & Fitness

Shawn Ryan's Suicide Attempt in a Medellín Stupor

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026 Health & Fitness

Blacked out drunk at a bar in Boca Raton, Ryan went home and attempted suicide three ways in one night: running his car in a closed garage, retrieving a .45 from the safe, and only surviving because the heat melted a hole in his gas tank — which dripped onto the muffler and started a fire. He woke up upstairs with no memory, saw the gun on the couch, smelled the exhaust, and realized what he'd done.

I mean, I should be Ted 10 times over by now. Like, I tried to kill myself in my garage.

Shawn Ryan

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controv…

Health & Fitness

Ryan's suicide attempt: blacked-out, garage

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026

Shawn Ryan attempted suicide by leaving his car running in a closed garage while blacked out drunk; the heat melted a hole in the gas tank, which dripped onto the muffler and started a fire.

Society & Culture

Strickland had father in picture until 17

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026

Strickland's abusive, alcoholic father was in the household until age 17, when a then-professional-fighter Sean physically removed him from his mother's bedroom and he left for good.

The key is sobriety, right? So like what people don't realize that it doesn't matter how fucked up you are, sobriety is like what keeps you from going over the edge.

Sean Strickland

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controv…

Health & Fitness

Sobriety as the only safety net

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026

Strickland argued that sobriety is the only thing preventing truly damaged people from going over the edge, since alcohol removes inhibition and enables any act.

Health & Fitness

Playing Russian Roulette: Sean Strickland's Closest Call With Death

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026 Health & Fitness

Strickland kept a loaded .38 revolver next to his bed as a young fighter, spinning the cylinder and putting it to his head. One night, alone with a girlfriend named Jackie, he loaded a round, spun it, cocked the gun against his temple — and she grabbed it away. He says even now, revolvers feel like a game he never finished. One pull. That's all he wants.

Health & Fitness

Strickland played Russian roulette as a teen

#325 Sean Strickland - The Most Controversial Fighter in th… · Jul 27, 2026

As a young fighter, Strickland kept a .38 revolver loaded with one round next to his bed and spun the cylinder, putting it to his head repeatedly; a girlfriend physically grabbed the gun away.

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