Quote · Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Animal Attack III
Where this was said
Darren's Kentucky Horse Life and Thai Monkey War
At 30:53 · chapter starts 22:25
The conversation starts with Darren's fascinating career revelation: top stallions command $250,000 per mating session and can breed 200 mares per season, making a $10.5 million 2-year-old horse potentially a rational purchase [1] — Darren "A single 2-year-old horse recently sold for $10.5 million in Florida. The real money is in stud fees: top stallions command $250,000 per ma…" 24:39 . Then Darren tells his Thailand story: on a sunset cruise to Koh Phi Phi approximately 20 years ago, he snorkeled to Monkey Beach despite being unable to swim, nearly drowning before making shore. There, his girlfriend Jill offered a piece of banana to a macaque with a semi-closed fist, and the monkey — interpreting this as withholding — bit deep into her forearm. Its alarm call summoned 30-plus monkeys who charged toward her. Darren jumped in front and attempted to physically fight the mob, throwing punches and kicks without connecting once, but somehow scattering the pack [2] — Darren "After his girlfriend Jill was bitten on the forearm at Monkey Beach, one monkey's alarm call brought 30 more charging toward her. Darren ju…" 30:30 . With no boat available for his return and being unable to swim back, he was forced to beg two giggling women on a banana float for a ride, sitting in the middle while the entire 75-person cruise ship watched from the railing. The trip ended beautifully at Maya Bay, but the vacation's denouement was Jill needing rabies shots every two days at clinics across Thailand — a protocol Darren had never heard of, since Ireland has no rabies.
A single 2-year-old horse recently sold for $10.5 million in Florida. The real money is in stud fees: top stallions command $250,000 per mare and can breed 200 mares in a season — potentially $50 million in one year from a single horse.
Darren revealed a horse recently sold for $10.5 million in Ocala, Florida — a 2-year-old that could still get sick and die.
Top-market stallions command $250,000 per mating session and can breed up to 200 mares per season, generating up to $50 million in a single year.
Darren couldn't swim, but a life jacket in shallow waters had given him false confidence. He grabbed snorkel gear and set off across open water toward Monkey Beach. After 20 seconds he raised his head — and the shore looked impossibly far away. He made it, barely.
After a monkey bit Darren's girlfriend Jill on the forearm at Monkey Beach in Thailand, it screamed and summoned over 30 more monkeys who all charged toward her.
After his girlfriend Jill was bitten on the forearm at Monkey Beach, one monkey's alarm call brought 30 more charging toward her. Darren jumped in front and started throwing kicks and punches at a gang of macaques — not connecting once, but somehow scattering the entire group.
After fighting off 30 monkeys, Darren had to beg two giggling women on a tiny banana float for a ride back to the ship. They demanded he sit in the middle. He did. The whole ship was watching as they slowly paddled back.
