Snapshot · Smosh Reads Reddit Stories
Shayne explained the famous Reddit 'poop knife' story — a man discovered his family's bathroom knife for breaking up large stools was not a universal household item when he visited his girlfriend's family.
Where this was said
At 55:00 · chapter starts 51:55
After the Zoom call story triggers a digression about Jared's early pandemic stand-up experience, the group devolves into a deeply enjoyable conversation about bodily functions and FaceTime etiquette. Jared wonders whether it's appropriate to burp while on a family FaceTime call from your own home; Chanse says yes and Shayne gives a context-dependent ruling. Jared then delivers his closing philosophical monologue: while getting ready, he heard his own fart and felt a sudden wave of empathy — his butt is just a 'sweet little butt' that has no awareness of social norms. Shayne wraps up with a brief explanation of the famous Reddit poop knife story for uninitiated listeners (Jared and Chanse), before all three say goodbye and wish the audience a happy Pride.
Jared Goldstein's first Zoom stand-up show was on March 15, 2020 — day one of pandemic lockdowns. He performed five minutes of jokes in silence thinking he was bombing, then finally heard laughter and realized the audience had been muted the whole time. A masterclass in bad timing.
Jared Goldstein performed five minutes of stand-up on a Zoom charity show in March 2020 without realizing the audience audio was muted — he thought he was bombing in silence until he finally heard laughs.
Shayne Topp recounted the legendary Reddit 'poop knife' story: a man who grew up with a family bathroom knife specifically for breaking up large stools visited his girlfriend's family and confidently asked where their poop knife was — only to discover his family was the only one that had one.
Jared Goldstein ended the episode by sharing a genuine realization: his butt has no idea that anyone is offended by its natural functions. It's just a sweet little butt doing its best. Hard to argue with that.
San Francisco's average rent rose 18% over the past two years to $3,728/month, surpassing New York City as the most expensive rental market in the country.
San Francisco's average monthly rent now stands at $3,728, surpassing New York City to become the most expensive rental city in the United States.
At a childhood sleepover, Bobby Lee's friends drew penises on his face and he walked 7 miles home on a dirt road before being picked up by Eric Purvis's mom.
In 1950, about 60% of the world lived in extreme poverty; today it's about 1 in 10, attributable to capitalist economic growth.
From 2021 to 2024, 6 million children fell below the poverty line in the US after the expanded child tax credit expired.
Private domestic infant and international adoptions typically cost $40,000 to $70,000, while foster care adoption is the most affordable route at $0 to $2,000.
Historically, only 40% of men have ever reproduced — Galloway uses this to argue that romantic success requires effort, not a hall pass.
Robby Hoffman is the 7th of 10 children raised in a Hasidic household in Montreal, where the family was poor and comedy was a survival mechanism.
Robby's Hasidic community had no concept of 'too soon' in comedy — if it was funny, you threw it, and if you bombed, your sibling told you immediately.
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