The celebrity stylist who dresses Hollywood's biggest stars says the most powerful thing you can do every morning costs nothing: ask yourself "How do I want to feel?" before opening your closet.
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The celebrity stylist who dresses Hollywood's biggest stars says the most powerful thing you can do every morning costs nothing: ask yourself "How do I want to feel?" before opening your closet.
TL;DR
Celebrity stylist Erin Walsh joins Mel Robbins to reveal a radical reframe for getting dressed: instead of asking "what should I wear?" ask yourself six words — "How do I want to feel?" This shift turns your closet from a source of shame into a portal of possibility. Three women from the Mel Robbins Podcast team — a new mom, a postmenopausal woman, and a breast cancer survivor — try the method live with startling results. The single most useful takeaway: pick three words that describe how you want to feel, then use your existing clothes as tools to embody them.
Celebrity stylist and Women's Wear Daily Stylist of the Year Erin Walsh joins Mel Robbins to share her philosophy of intentional dressing — using clothing as a tool to embody how you want to feel each day. The conversation introduces a transformative six-word question to ask every morning before opening your closet.
Chapter 4 · 05:39
You think fashion isn't for you? You're already in the game.
Calling fashion 'not for me' doesn't opt you out — you're in the game of being alive and being in the world. The question is whether you're using the tool intentionally or letting it use you.
Most people's closets are full of people they no longer are: the jeans from your twenties, the dress you bought for the person you hoped to become. That's why opening the closet feels like a minefield — it's not your present self looking back at you, it's a gallery of past selves judging you.
Chapter 5 · 11:20
It's not a dress rehearsal, but you gotta learn how to play the part — not just play it, but embody the part so you feel it of the person you want to be.
Chapter 6 · 16:00
6 words before you open your closet will change everything about your day.
Before you open your closet, stop and ask yourself: 'How do I want to feel?' Those six words are the entire method. Starting from how you want to feel — not what looks acceptable — is the difference between dressing from a place of self-worth and dressing from a place of not enough.
Chapter 7 · 19:42
Pick 3 words before you open your closet. Watch what changes.
Three feeling words each morning — effortless, easy, elegant; or bold, empowered, like a boss — physically changes which clothes you reach for. The words are your filter. Everything that doesn't serve them becomes invisible noise.
Erin Walsh recommends identifying three feeling words each morning (e.g., effortless, easy, elegant) to guide every outfit decision.
Chapter 8 · 24:10
She was sick, exhausted, and had 9 episodes to tape. Here's how she got through it.
Mel was sick, exhausted, and had to tape nine podcast episodes in four days. She asked herself: how do I want to feel? Invincible. Unstoppable. Confident. She pulled on knee-high boots and powered through every single day. Then on Friday she asked again — this time the answer was 'safe, protected, soft' — and she put on old sweatpants and slept for three days. Same method, two completely different results.
Mel Robbins described using Erin's method during an exhausting production week — choosing boots to feel 'invincible' and powering through nine podcast episodes in four days.
The question 'How do I want to feel?' asked before opening your closet is Erin Walsh's core method for intentional dressing.
Chapter 9 · 27:55
Erin Walsh argues that when you dress to impress others before asking how you want to feel, you've already decided you're not good enough for the world.
Erin Walsh argues that when you dress to impress others before asking how you want to feel, you've already decided you're not good enough for the world.
Chapter 10 · 31:08
Dressing to impress others is why you feel like a fraud in the room.
Mel Robbins admitted she only started wearing matching bras and underwear in the last year, after years of holding on to worn-out, ill-fitting undergarments.
When you dress to impress others first, you step on your own words, feel uncomfortable, and stop acting like yourself. But when you start from how you want to feel, your choices align with who you actually are — and that's when the room feels different.
Chapter 11 · 36:00
You should dress to embody the person you want to be first for yourself, because by honoring who you want to be for yourself, then you offer that to the world.
Chapter 12 · 40:04
You don't need to buy anything. You need to try on everything you own.
The Art of Intentional Dressing requires no shopping. The starting point is the three pieces in your closet right now that make you feel great. Use those as your uniform, take photos, and build from there. You don't need more clothes. You need a different relationship with the ones you have.
Erin Walsh advises going through every item in your closet every three months, trying each piece on to see how it makes you feel.
Chapter 13 · 45:10
Erin Walsh notes that most people gravitate to the same small rotation of clothes, which causes them to stop expanding and growing.
Erin Walsh notes that most people gravitate to the same small rotation of clothes, which causes them to stop expanding and growing.
Erin Walsh says most people wear clothes that don't fit their proportions, and tailoring — even at the dry cleaner — is the single best way to look more put-together.
Erin Walsh notes that most women embody eight to nine different identities throughout a day, and clothing should be able to shift and support each of those roles.
Chapter 15 · 55:00
She had a baby 11 months ago. Here's what happened when she asked 'how do I want to feel?'
Less than a year postpartum, Jessie had swapped clothes that didn't fit for ones two sizes too big. She wasn't honoring her new body — she was hiding from it. Using the six-word question, she put on bootcut jeans, ankle boots, and jewelry for the first time in months. Her words: powerful, beautiful, confident.
Podcast video editor Jessie described going two sizes above her pre-baby size to hide her body, rather than finding clothes that fit and honor her new shape.
Chapter 16 · 1:05:00
She hated this episode idea. Then the method changed her morning anyway.
Amy didn't want to produce this episode. She didn't care about fashion. But when she finally tried the method and chose the words creative, empowered, and fun, she went through five blazers that didn't fit, found one that did, and showed up in an electric-blue double-breasted jacket. Her new chapter word? Magical.
When you don't feel at home in your body — postpartum, post-illness, mid-menopause — structure in your clothing creates the feeling of being held and grounded. A small heel. A defined collar. A belt. These aren't trends. They're anchors.
Chapter 17 · 1:16:20
She wore lipstick to every chemo session. She didn't know it had a name.
Through nine months of cancer treatment, including chemotherapy and losing all her hair, Cindy did her nails, wore lipstick, and put on a pink ski hat to every session. She didn't have the language for it, but she was already practicing intentional dressing — using clothes and color to feel bold even on the hardest days.
Team member Cindy, a breast cancer survivor, wore lipstick, did her nails, and donned a pink hat to every chemotherapy appointment as an act of intentional self-expression.
We think our sandbox is our whole world — the comfortable zone of tools and friends and habits we know. But look up and you'll see the sandbox is on a beach. We make our own boxes of what's possible without realizing everything else that exists beyond the edge.
Cindy realized she had been saving her pearl necklace (a 60th birthday gift from her children) exclusively for evenings, and decided to start wearing it during the day as an act of self-worth.
No indexed bits in this chapter.
Before you open your closet, stop and ask yourself: 'How do I want to feel?' Those six words are the entire method. Starting from how you want to feel — not what looks acceptable — is the difference between dressing from a place of self-worth and dressing from a place of not enough.
Mel was sick, exhausted, and had to tape nine podcast episodes in four days. She asked herself: how do I want to feel? Invincible. Unstoppable. Confident. She pulled on knee-high boots and powered through every single day. Then on Friday she asked again — this time the answer was 'safe, protected, soft' — and she put on old sweatpants and slept for three days. Same method, two completely different results.
This episode
Factual claims made this episode, and whether a source was named.
Erin Walsh was named Stylist of the Year by Women's Wear Daily.
iHerb has delivered wellness products to more than 15 million customers around the world for nearly 30 years.
IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the United States.
Kids who use IXL are scoring higher on tests across all 50 states.
Verizon has the best overall mobile network performance in the US based on RootMetrics second half of 2025 results.
Most people habitually wear the same eight items of clothing over and over again.
Claritin D starts working in as little as thirty minutes.
Mel Robbins was nominated for a Golden Globe and had to walk the red carpet for the first time, which is how she met Erin Walsh.
Expedia allows travelers to save up to 30% when bundling flights, hotels, vacation rentals, cars, and activities together.
Cindy underwent nine months of breast cancer treatment including a lumpectomy, chemotherapy, and lost her hair during treatment.
This episode
Celebrity stylist, Women's Wear Daily Stylist of the Year, and author of 'The Art of Intentional Dressing'; the episode's primary guest and expert.
Mel Robbins was nominated for a Golden Globe and first worked with Erin Walsh for the red carpet, which is how they met.
Friend of Erin Walsh and co-author of 'All the Cool Girls Get Fired'; her 'sandbox on the beach' metaphor was cited as a key illustration of limiting beliefs.
Mentioned as one of Erin Walsh's high-profile celebrity clients whose styling illustrates the reach of Walsh's expertise.
Episode sponsor offering vitamins, supplements, and wellness products; serving over 15 million customers worldwide for nearly 30 years.
Episode sponsor; Mel Robbins cited being a Verizon customer for over a decade and praised its nationwide coverage.
Episode sponsor offering over 200 flexible online degree programs for adult learners.
Trade publication that named Erin Walsh its Stylist of the Year, cited as a credential establishing her expertise.
Erin Walsh's bestselling book that forms the philosophical and practical foundation of the episode's teachings.
Educational platform used in 96 of the top 100 US school districts; an episode sponsor offering adaptive K-12 learning.
AI productivity tool sponsored segment where Mel Robbins described using it to draft emails and reduce mental load.
Location of Mel Robbins's barn studio where the episode was recorded, described as the first fireside chat episode taped there.
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